6 things to help husband be an active father
Where many mothers complaint about father's being inactive and less participative in parenthood, is it really their mistake ? If feel NO. I don't support inactive fatherhood but at the same time would not want to blame them completely for their behaviour.
Some of the major reason father's are still inactive are :
- Most of the fathers have seen their own father's rare participation in their upbringing and they feel it's normal for a mother to raise a child single handedly.
- It's we as mother's who always take the first step and never wait for a father to initiate anything for the child.
- I agree that mothers have a different connect with a child but so does a father has, but we as mother's always feel we know the best for our child, which surely draws back a father's interest.
But to change this and make a better bond between a father and a child we can surely make these small changes
1. Share the responsibility from very beginning
Changing nappies and feeding a baby is no longer only a mother's job. With technology expressing milk has become easy, so now even the fathers can feed the baby and let the new mother relax a little longer. Taking complete responsibility of the baby during earlier days and then expecting a sudden involvement of the father is not reasonable. Let him be part of the baby's journey from the very beginning.
2. Don't force your parenting style
Expression of love and care if different for different people and so is parenting. Every parent deals with a situation differently, handles a child differently. Let your husband play his role as a father according to his parenting style. Don't enforce your parenting style on your husband. It will pull him back and the interest in parenthood can be lost.
3. Take even small decisions simultaneously
As a mother you could be the best decision maker for your baby, but you are not the only parent. The father has equal right to know and decide for the baby. A small decision of what clothes to buy for a baby, if taken jointly, surely gives the father a sense of presence in parenthood. Making decisions alone can make the father feel left out.
4. Don't think about social norms
If your are someone who has recently joined parenthood, I am sure you will keep hearing that your father or your father in law have never changed nappy, or made the baby sleep, or fed the baby, or bathe the baby but your husband does all this. And if you hear this, take pride in it, that your husband has surpassed the previous generation's thinking and has taken all the pains to become a great father. Let the social words not affect his fatherhood journey.
5. Make sure to have father and baby time
A mother is always there for a child, but making sure to give some alone time to father and child is equally important. We as mother's surely get a little more time with our little ones, but ensure that your husband too gets his share with the child. A mother may need to give up on her time with the child if the situation demands.
6. Share the baby's routine and development with your husband
Sharing things about baby's development, routine, activities helps the father to catch up on those missed moments. There are times when the father wishes to be with the child but is unable to. Try to help him not have that guilt but help him become part of those beautiful moments. This will want him to surely push his boundaries and try to make up for it next time.
Father's surely love their children as much as a mother does, it just that their expression of love is different. Expression of love is important for a child, it give a sense of comfort and safety to your lil one. A father's roles is equally important for a child development and growth, make sure to give the best version of yourself to your child.
Happy Parenthood.
Comments
Post a Comment